Sean John? WTF??

Who the Hell is Sean John?

Try saying “Sean John” five times fast. Go on!

Makes you sound like an lisping, fat-tongued idiot, doesn’t it?

Now try saying “Puff Daddy” five times fast.

This is getting boring, right?

Now try saying “P Diddy” just once!

Yep – once is enough, isn’t it?

What the hell is it with Sean Combs? He starts off his (by all accounts commerically successful) music career calling himself “Puff Daddy”, which I have to admit I could never accept. The Daddy of all Puffs was either The Honey Monster or Larry Grayson/ Kenneth Williams. No one else comes close.

Honey!Larry!

Oooh! Matron!!

So that proves that “Puff Daddy” is a fraudulent and misleading name for Sean Combs.

Publicly declaring his intention to re-invent himself, although most likely realising this error, he then took the name “P Diddy”. This name is clearly ridiculous. End of story.

Or is it? He then appears on the Today Show in 2005 to announce his newest contribution to our global culture: dropping the “P” from “P Diddy”. His reasoning: “the P was getting between me and my fans.”

Our hero decided to become a fashion designer in 1998, marketing clothes under his first two names, Sean John.

So what’s with this constant self-reinvention? Most people are quite content to be known by the same name(s) throughout their lifetime. These are some of the possible explanations I can think of:

  • Cheap publicity
  • Insecurity
  • A desire to put the gun-toting past behind him
  • Sheer Posing
  • A deep-seated conviction that “Puff Daddy” was the wrong choice and fundamentally misrepresents the deep and complex characteristics of his soul.

This whole renaming thing is so lame. Why do I go on about it? Well, it reminds me of when they renamed Marathon to Snickers, or Opal Fruits to Starburst or Midland Bank to HSBC. Nothing really changed, just a name. So much in public life nowadays is about what things seem, rather than what they are.

Toothpick! LOL!

Oh – and take that stupid toothpick out of your mouth. It just looks stupid. The last people I saw doing that who thought it made them look cool and tough were the kids on my schoolbus when I was twelve.

You’re not a ganster, Puffy/Diddy/whatever you’re called today. You make “music” and perfume.

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